Five minute fridays: what mama did

I saw my friend Ali's post on this prompt and I knew that I needed to write this--because today is my momma's birthday. 

My momma carried me 41 1/2 weeks and labored over 24 hours for me. She gave up her nursing career to raise me. She worked a crazy overnight shift Friday night into Saturday and then came home and cared for her stubborn, bottle-refusing, infant daughter. She led me to Jesus in our little blue kitchen in the middle of making pies. She became camp nurse so that her little one could go to camp and still have the comfort of having momma near (I didn't go to camp without her until I was 15!) She drove me everywhere and made that space the place to share everything that was on my heart. She loved my dad and together they gave me the stability of a happy home. She challenged me, rebuked me, corrected me and encouraged me. She got up at 5am with me everyday for 6 months or more to pray for me and trust God with me for each day. She loved me enough to let me go, yet also loves me enough to let me come home anytime I want. She was my role model, as nurse, as mother, as wife and friend. I thank God for her always and wish her a very happy day!

Stuck in Him

I have been thinking an praying about a pretty major decision lately and as I see the Lord reveal His will to me I am thrilled at the confirmations that He has sent my way.

The decision before me would have been a major change in location for a girl who has grown up in the same town since she was 7, the same church since she was born. The girl who likes to travel but always loves coming home. The girl who finally moved out at the age of 25, a mile and a half down the road!

Then I read Ann Voskamp's blog--and she said "I'd just stayed here." 

And this morning Ron Hutchcraft said," Wherever you are, be all there."

And so here I will stay and rejoice in the good gifts that the Father has given me!

Here am I

The answer is "here am I"---the words that Isaiah spoke when the Lord asked "Whom shall I send and who shall go for us?"

I have wrestled with this question--wanting to answer like Isaiah, fearing what that might mean. 

Interestingly enough, the word send carries with it the idea of the shoot growing out from a vine. And the word go carries with it the idea of the manner of life lived. 

Sound familiar? Maybe reminiscent of Jesus' words "I am the vine; you are the branches. Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing."

When the Lord asks, "whom shall I send"---He is asking "who will be a branch from my vine?" And when He asks, "who shall go for us"---He is asking "who will live for Me?"

So maybe the "here I am" is more about who we are in Christ--not where we are geographically or circumstantially.

Here I am. In the same town I grew up in. In the same church that I have always attended. In the same ministry for almost 10 years. And Here I am. Ready and willing Lord to be used of You! 

How Great is our God!

I was reading Solomon's accounting of the house that he built for the Lord. The temple was a magnificient structure--it took 7 years to complete! But Solomon, in all his wisdom, says this: "The house that I am to build will be great, for our God is greater than all gods.  But who is able to build him a house, since heaven, even highest heaven, cannot contain him? Who am I to build a house for him, except as a place to make offerings before him?" 2Chronicles 2:5-6
The work that we do for the Lord is just that-- an offering of worship before Him. It is not because of our greatness "Who am I?" but because of His greatness that we give our lives as worship for Him, and to Him for His glory!

I am thankful today for:

The reminder that our God is a miracle working God!!

A new look at an old story--seeing through the life of Mary that not understanding and yet believing can walk hand in hand as we wonder at all that He is!!

The sun rise reminding me that the Son has risen!!

Hope and healing in the ICU

His grace is sufficient for me!!

He alone is worthy of all praise

For warmth when it is cold, and cold when it is warm--oh, Lord, we are so blessed

For chats over lunches with good friends

For seeing & surrendering to Him each day

For the care and genuine concern and encouragement for me offered by dear friends

For being able to catch glimpses of what God is doing!

Control

I was watching some TV show and one of the characters had gone through some pretty difficult situations and was recognizing that in life she must yield up control. 

Yup, me too. 

I too need to learn to yield up control. I control what I say and do so that people will be happy with me. I control what I wear and what I look like to gain the approval of others. I control the skills that I have and the work that I do so that everyone will know that I am a good nurse. I control whatever I can. 

And then it comes crashing down. The stress of that kind of self-inflicted responsibility only causes anxiety and fear. Because the reality is that I have no control. But unlike the character in the show I was watching I don't just yield control to the fates. I can yield up control to Someone who loves me! Jesus came to rescue us from the folly of ourselves. He is my Savior (and oh, how desperately I need a Savior!) But He is also my Lord. He is the King of Kings and the Lord of lords. He is the Eternal One. Colossians says that: " For by Him all things were created, in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or dominions or rulers or authorities—all things were created through Him and for Him. And He is before all things, and in Him all things hold together." 

I don't need to hold it together because He is holding all things together. And daily I need to preach this message to myself that "His grace is sufficient for me." When I yield control to Him I place my appearance, my reputation, my job, my future, my life in His hands. I don't need to get it right all the time. I don't even need to be the perfect Christian. Jesus saved me knowing full well that I would mess up and that I would fail. He knows my weaknesses and He loves me anyways. "If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and cleanse us from all unrighteousness."

So Lord, I pray that I would learn to rest in Your grace, to trust in Your plan and remember that You are the One who holds it all together! 

Amen!

The Path is Bright!

But the path of the righteous is like the light of dawn, which shines brighter and brighter until full day Proverbs 4:18

Counting His goodness and His grace today:

Thankful for the balm of work...in Kneading bread, I am reminded that I need Him.

For the comfort of chats and chai with my mom and sister

for the wonder of each new day--the path "shines brighter and brighter" until That Day!

for the beauty of songs like this:

This yummy recipe: http://www.littlekitchenbigbites.com/2012/08/23/butternut-squash-sweet-potato-brown-butter-sage-lasagna/

Patience in Tribulation

"Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer." Romans 12:12

It sits on my desk. The Joy Box that I made. Over and over and over it says: "Count it all joy!"--the rest of that verse says, "when you face trials of many kinds, knowing that the testing of your faith produces patience and let patience have its perfect work that you may be perfect and complete lacking nothing." James 1:2-4

And so I will keep counting...

a wonderful weekend at Iroquoina

meeting new friends who are like old friends

worshipping with others who Love You!

hearing from the hearts of young men who are set on passionately serving the Savior

building snowmen and playing in castles--feeling like a kid again

safety on the roads--Jesus carrying my poor old car there and back again

His grace is sufficient for me.

seeing my cousins!

hugs that say what words can never say

hearing of His workings even in our sorrow

that even in the furnance He is with me

that the flames removed their bonds alone

Thankful for all He is and all He has done!