living too long in Hollywood

I am reading an interesting novel right now entitled: Heartland, by Davis Bunn. Without going into too much detail it takes place in the sub-culture of Hollywood. One little line jumped out at me as I read today. "He was a man well accustomed to the Hollywood usage of truth, as in, change it to suit your purpose." Today I felt like this man-- and I fulfilled this saying, much to my shame.

In an effort to try not to offend, and perhaps in an effort to not be perceived as a prude, I told some one an untruth, a lie. I could have spoken the truth and still not offended but my fear pulled the words from me before I had time to catch them. I am 26 years old and lying is something that I know is wrong and yet here I am catching myself in it again. It may not be the premeditated lying of my youth--reading after I had been sent to bed and then snapping off the light when I heard my parents footfall on the stairs. But it is lying none the less. It is a lie whether it comes out of my mouth or not; every time I act to please man and not My Father. I allow fear of what others think, fear of failure, to bind me up in a web of deceit. Because I think if you really knew me you probably would think less of me.

Father God-- I know that I cannot live this lie--Lord forgive me for the times I have lied, with my lips, and with my actions. Father, free me from this deceit and fill me with Your truth. Lord thank you that the freeing work was already accomplished on Calvary! I am free! Thank you, Lord Jesus--may I live in the reality of that truth and bear the fruit of the Vine.

I am amazed by His Grace! That is why this blog is entitled Kept by Grace. Because the most amazing thing about my salvation is that the God who saves did so knowing full well that I would do the majority of my sinning after I was saved! Truly we serve an amazing God!

I cried when I read Ann Voskamp's post for today @ www.aholyexperience.com She says this:

"Heaven and earth both know I am a miserable mess away from perfect. This is exactly why the bruised knees just have to bend at the table of communion, and say, yes, please.

I need Jesus.

I need His life.

I need the perfect, sinless sacrifice of Jesus Christ who can take all the broken messes and make them into mosaics of Grace."

Amen & Amen

Today was Monday and I went back to work after a truly beautiful weekend. I left work today and I thought "Why is thankfulness so easy on the weekends?" because as I drove home I wasn't sure what I had to be thankful for. I was struggling with guilt over my lying tongue and falling prey to the lie that I am unusable by God. And then I recall "My Grace is sufficient for you." Thank you, Lord. And as I thanked Him the gifts kept coming to mind.

A coffee drink that doesn't wreck my stomach!

Bran muffins stuffed with dates

Enjoying a yummy lunch someone else made because it is Meeting Monday

80 degree whether on days when in years past we have had snow

News that an old co-worker is joining our team!

Dinner at home with family

Dessert and discussions with my sister!

Forgiveness granted by a friend.

The funny fact that my little brother is learning to drive and my parents won't let him drive with me or my sister yet (ages 26 & 21 respectively). If that doesn't make you smile I don't know what will.

Finding one of my favorite hymns sung by one of my favorite groups here